Why I Decided To Create This Site

I've been writing my usual blog It's All A Bit Pony and Trap for nearly four years now, and in that time have gone from a lucrative career in IT to living the dream and earning just slightly more than fuck all as a professional writer. Most of what I write on my other blog is there to take the piss out of things I think are shit, and also, let's be honest, to rile up Liverpool supporters. However, most of the stuff my clients pay me to write is different. I'm not a fiction writer, in fact the only real fiction writing I had done before I started marketing myself as a writer was, well, maybe 40% or so of my old IT CV, but sometimes I get called upon to write reviews for other people's websites, and these, I am afraid to tell you, contain about as much reality as that story that was in the papers recently about Liz Hurley banging Bill Clinton.

Most of what you read when it comes to reviews on the web is serving somebody, and has been written by somebody who has never even tried the product. Is this a bad thing? Well, yes. It's not what Jesus would have done for a living, and that is for certain, but to be honest if you really believe everything you see online you were probably one of those kids who never questioned how those four oddly twee kids and a dog managed to regularly foil smuggling operations in those Famous Five books. Didn't they all have names like Fanny and Titty and Dick that weren't funny in the fifties and yet are now hilarious? I think that is too much of a coincidence, I reckon Blyton knew exactly what she was doing. Anyway - I digress.

So, figuring that when I am writing for fun instead of money I like to rip things that suck apart, and that most reviews on websites are at best, biased, and at worst, as fake as my old "Cartier" watch, which was purchased on the street in a foreign land (it looked a bit like this one but the gold wore off after a while), I thought I'd start doing a real review site. What will I review? I don't know yet. If you have any suggestions, hit me up in the comments. But don't just say 'Liverpool shirts', you know I'll get to that...